Monday, December 13, 2010

Love Therapy: Maintaining Consistency

Consistency, one of the top reasons why relationships fail. The reason why our women say "he doesn't do the things he used to" and the reason why our men say "she's not the same person I remember". Consistency is vital in our relationships and will make or break them. Consistency by definition means "an agreement or harmony of parts or features to one another or a whole", that being said, what are we agreeing on and where is our harmony that is necessary? 

We as human beings are instinctively seeking the most comfortable and pleasurable circumstances, this is the only thing that is naturally consistent within our personalities. With a combination of life experience and external influence we develop an internal persona which influences our perspectives, decisions, and attractions. We let this persona develop what our idea of love is and that becomes an item of our basic instinct; to be comfortable and pleased, we have to fight our instinct. 

People are continuously changing within relationships, however, love does not change. In order to have a sense of consistency we must embody a synonymous definition of love (ex. 1 Corinthians 13). As we hold on to our definition our personalities, as they mature and change, will never not seem consistent. The things we did at the beginning of our relationship will never go away, they will never seem old, and anything more will be residual.

Two persons agreement to love produces a harmony between 
The two hearts, it allows them two apply every variable of their love to each other consistently. This doesn't mean that there won't be issues within the relationship but it does mean that issues will be solved with love and resentment should not exist. Maintain your consistency by upholding your agreement to love and fight against your instinct when your instinct becomes selfish.

Friday, December 10, 2010

Love therapy: Destroy & Rebuild Foundations

In relationships we all must be aware that not everything old is compatible with the new. There are things that worked for us in our past relationships that may not work for us in our future ones. A relationship is much like a house that gets built from the ground up. If u want that house to last it must have a strong foundation. Lots of people build their homes using the blueprints of other peoples foundations, move in and everything slowly falls apart. The house is eventually destroyed and that foundation you laid remains until you decide to build a new one. 

The entire process of destroying and rebuilding foundations starts with constructing your personal foundation. Prepare yourself with patience and understanding, identify what it is that you are searching for and be able to articulate it to whomever it is you decide to be involved with. You must also have the ability to recognize when a person isn't on the same page as you and make the proper adjustments as necessary i.e limiting interaction, calls, and be able to convey why you made your adjustment. After making any form of an adjustment you must remain firm in your decision (much like a foundation). 

Make sure you build your foundation with constructive qualities and beliefs. A constructive foundation allows you to embody what what you need and after, you'll be able to impose your needs onto potential partners without forcing them to compromise their own values allowing them to keep their sense of self. This also allows them to give to you confidently and comfortably of themselves, nobody enjoys feeling like they are being taken from so be sure to make it easy for people to want to give to you. 

It isn't difficult for a person to recognize another person who has a well constructed foundation. You have an outward expression of an embodied stronghold. Your confidence, mannerisms, and ability to communicate will manifest themselves more proficiently because of your strengthened foundation. Only those who have built strong foundations have the ability to withstand the weathering of a real relationship so, build on you before attempting to build with somebody. 

Thursday, December 9, 2010

Again

You the love of my life
If you ever lost your memories of me and I had to earn your love all over again I would
I'd take the risk to lose you just to get those priceless moment back again I would
I'd go thru the awkward moment of meeting you, the one of kissing you and goin thru the extra mile just to get next to you
If I had to do it I'd run to the moment of the first time I'd seen your gorgeous smile
I'm thinking that if I knew then what I now we could've been here right now a whole lot sooner
Or how I could go back to when you used to think I had stop caring only for me to have found a new way to draw nearer to you 
Yea I'd probably do it again above all because I'd get to revisit that moment when love really set in and I realized I never stopped having those moments because they are still happening. 
So happily I'd love you all over again
I'd touch you right there again
Kiss you just like that again just to make you say I love you like you did the first time again.
Baby it doesn't even matter what state of mind you were in because once we were in love I'd gladly make you fall again.